As hopeful plans and proclamations of change swirl about in the excitement of a new year – I stand in awe at the ability we have to burst through the seams of the past and into the future with optimism. A few weeks prior to that midnight hour I usually find myself prepared, setting goals before me and into motion while fully expecting success.
Yet, nearly a week into this year – I’m drawn into a place of seclusion, undecided on how to define my purpose in this new beginning. I’m left almost speechless watching the excitement, as others establish their word of the year. This cluster of letters that fulfill their dreams and feverish ambitions for a new and improved life has brought me to a place of sweet recognition.
My heart and soul long. They long to be what I feel I have not been. Engaged. Engaged in the moment. Engaged in the sweet laughter of my children as they totter on the brink of childhood. Engaged in every moment they need me, in every moment they want me. Engaged. Engaged and savoring the fleeting moments that remain with my grandmother. Engaged and fully taking in the precious bonds that bind my very being to my husband. Engaged in every conversation with my parents.
Engaged in the sounds and scents that make up each season. Engaged in life instead of being trapped behind a cloud of fear, disappointment, and hurt. Engaged in the life I have been so blessed to have bestowed upon me. Engaged in the challenges as well as the blessings. Engaged.
This year, I commit myself to being engaged.
Therefore if any man be in Christ, he is a new creature: old things are passed away; behold, all things are become new. – 2 Corinthians 5:17